Are you giving away your Happiness?

Hello friends

If you have been to the Mid Mitten Morsels blog before then you know that I love to share easy recipes, cooking tips, and even some gardening knowledge with you. What you may not know is that the inspiration for this blog was the circle of amazing girlfriends who call themselves “The Twenty-Something Group.” You can read more about these women in my About Me section but basically, this group gathers each week to pour into one another.

I wanted to capture that experience with this blog. Those sweet moments of laughter and truth, where we bared our souls and shared our favorite food. Those moments are invaluable to me, and I believe, essential for survival in this sometimes brutal world.

All that is to say that I hope this corner of the internet offers you more than a great recipe or clear explanation of how to clean a burnt pan (also essential to survival in my world). I hope in this space you also find some inspiration, joy, and know that you are loved.

That’s why today I am not offering you a recipe, but instead, a piece that falls into my category of “Truth Talk” basically the pep talks we all need now and then (myself included). Today I want to share with you an idea that has been rolling around in my head for a while now. I offer you a hypothesis about happiness.

One of my favorite quotes of all time comes from Teddy Roosevelt, it goes like this: comparison is the thief of joy.

Now, I know we all know this. We can see it in our own lives and in the lives of those around us. Social media showcases this better than anything else. Ooo, look at what she has. Why doesn’t my body, job, marriage, or house look like hers? And before we know it that little voice of envy has crept in and has us feeling unhappy.

We all understand how comparison can steal our joy, but can I propose another idea to you? One that takes this concept a step further. What if social media and comparison isn’t the problem? What if the truth is that you are the one who chooses to forfeit your happiness?

Whew

That’s a hard pill to swallow, but a truth that I need to hear. It’s a truth that formalized during my daily quiet time (this is a time each morning that I sit and pray and read the Bible or another devotional). In this sweet quiet space, I realized that the problem isn’t my social media feed, or my friends who excelled in areas I don’t, or even the world around me. The problem is me. And the problem is you.

The problem is that in order to be unhappy you have to choose to let something take your happiness from you. I was choosing to compare my life, and blog, and whatever else to others’.

Friends, there is so much more for us than that.

That’s not to say there won’t be times that we are unhappy. I personally have struggled with unhappiness and I know many friends who have struggled with their weight, their marriage, fertility, mental health, and many other things that truly bring hardship into our lives. It is okay to be sad. It is okay to not feel okay all the time.

But it is not okay to allow your self worth to be tarnished by what you view in other’s worlds. You are created to be one of a kind. You are radically and recklessly loved, and your life story and purpose will not look like anyone else’s.

So stop trying to compare. Stop giving away your happiness.

Here’s a little trick I’m using to accomplish this in my own life. Not only do I try really hard (and I say try because I like every human on the planet am not perfect even half of the time) but I try really really hard to take some time out of every morning to focus in.

I spend this time reading the bible and praying. In these moments I gain a lot of comfort and confidence in who God says I am, and who he has called me to be. But if that’s not your thing, here’s another suggestion on how to start practicing some intentional time in the morning. Take ten minutes to write seven things you are thankful for that morning, then list five people you love and three things that you are amazingly incredible at doing.

Then go start your day! And when the crummy parts of life creep in, you will be ready. In the moments where in the past you have given in and given up your joy, I want you to say these words,

“Not today!”

Then think back to your list from the morning.

Here’s my list:

Things I am thankful for:

1. My comfy bed (that I’m most likely still sitting in while I read and pray)
2. My house
3. Winchester, the fuzzy pup waiting for me downstairs
4. My handsome and hardworking husband.
5. My job, where I get to help others and solve problems.
6. My amazing coworkers (who make me laugh and sometimes cry)
7. And finally (but most importantly) the eternal love of my heavenly Father

People I love:

1. Sam
2. My Mom
3. My Dad
4. Chase
5. Elizabeth

Three things I am uniquely good at:

1. Listening to people when they need to share.
2. Baking a pretty amazing Delicious Moist Carrot Cake with Pineapple.
3. Building a March Madness Bracket based on Mascot Originality.

Now I am not going to claim for one moment that this is the end all be all answer to being happy. I know that our emotions, and the events that inspire them are often complex and difficult to work out. What I am suggesting is that you take a moment to really reflect on the focus of your thoughts.

Are you comparing yourself and your life to the perceptions of perfection you see around you? Or are you centered on the truth that you are custom created, genuinely loved, called to a purpose, with love and gratitude to give in return?

I would love to hear your thoughts, so leave a comment or shoot me an email.

Until we chat again,

~ Chloe M.